Ohio fugitive arrested in Arizona homeless shelter

I’m trying so hard not to become bitter. But I am drowning and don’t know what to do anymore. I finally managed to end my abusive marriage of 12 years in July. He had a psychotic break after I left and is living in a shelter in a nearby city. 70% of our income was from him, so I abruptly had to find a second job, and am 100% solo parenting.
My kiddo and I got to stay in our rented house, but I really cannot afford it. I leave for work at 7:30am and get home at 6:15pm and I’m exhausted all the time , so my house is disgusting. Trash piles, dirty dishes, etc. and I’m too ashamed to have people over. I’m just so mad. All I asked for was a little kindness. No yelling, and our (mine and kids’s) needs to be prioritized. We had everything and he ruined it.
I have a beautiful home, my dream job, and a beautiful community to live in. But I’m barely hanging on and I’m afraid I’m going to lose it. I started a second job at the elementary school, but didn’t realize that my pay was going to be spread to summer (since I’m part time, I thought it would be exempt from that). I make $1300/mo at my first job, which is exactly my rent. I make $1064/mo from the school. I got my first paycheck last week, and my car broke down the same day.
I lost everything to that relationship, and have almost no support network anymore. I shared my struggles on FB a couple times over the summer and had fewer than ten people even react to my posts about having to hide at a safe place until my husband was arrested.
I worked so hard to get to where I am, and it was going to work, and now I’m back to having to give up everything to avoid homelessness.

I saw her a day after my birthday. That Monday, she went to get a colonoscopy. She had a cardiac arrest and the doctors took 40 minutes to revive her. She has been in a vegetative state ever since. That was 11/13/2023.
I was planning on spending 2 nights with her on Thanksgiving, but this whole incident happened.
Today her heart stopped twice. The first time they managed to bring her back. The second time, they gave up.
Those doctors seemed like they wanted my mom to die. Also, the nurses was extremely rude to her: talking about her in front of the door, making snarky comments, not cleaning her properly, etc.
Her last texts to me were happy birthday message and emojis and saying that she loved me.
I held a knife to my wrist, but I just broke down and started crying out of no where.
My faith in God/Christianity is not strong anymore.
My mom was super perfect, she made mistakes, but she had a extremely kind heart. She donated tithes to food banks, children hospitals, homeless shelters, etc.. She loved to cook and feed homeless people. Every thanksgiving she makes lots of to-go plates for my brother to pass out to. homeless people.
It's not fair that those ass holes so called doctors can go back home to their families. That they can still talk to their parents and have fun with them. Why do evil people live long, but good people die young?
My dad passed away when I was 15 and my mom suffered brain damage and went into a vegetative state two days after my 32nd birthday.
My dad was in his early 30's and my mom was 56.
Had those doctors and nurses treated her better, she'd still be alive.

There is a serial killespree killer currently in LA. The police are having trouble finding this person. First things first.

1. Came anyone help identify this car?
2. Can anyone locate this guy on social with this type of vehicle?
3. Does anyone know this person?

Thank you.
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This is the information made public from https://www.lapdonline.org/newsroom/murders-involving-persons-experiencing-homelessness-nr23770am-dm/
Murders Involving Persons Experiencing Homelessness
Los Angeles: Detectives from the Los Angeles Police Department Robbery-Homicide Division are asking for the public’s help in providing any information that will lead to the arrest of the suspect responsible for the murders of persons experiencing homelessness in LAPD’s Central and South Bureau.
The Los Angeles Police Department is investigating three separate murders that occurred between November 26, 2023, and November 29, 2023. In each case, the victims were experiencing homelessness. While some similarities have been identified, detectives are working to determine if these murders are related. A community alert bulletin has been issued to make our unhoused population and our community stakeholders aware of the recent murders.
The suspect in these homicides is described only as male. The suspect was seen in a dark-colored sedan. It is unknown if he was alone or there were any additional suspects.
“As we always do in the face of a challenge or crisis, our region is mobilizing to respond to this issue. We will work tirelessly to find the individual responsible, arrest them, and hold them accountable. I have met with our partners at the Los Angeles Homeless Services Authority, Housing Authority of the City of Los Angeles, and the Los Angeles Housing Department and we are moving immediately to get the word out to our unhoused neighbors in housing networks. Our message to our unhoused community is clear – try not to be alone tonight. We will do all we can to make shelter and services available. To the many Angelenos who have friends or family who are unhoused, please let them know the danger that exists. We must stay safe. We will work diligently to bring those responsible to justice.” – Mayor Karen Bass
“The Los Angeles Police Department is employing all available resources to bring justice to these murder victims. I am thankful for our City partners who are working with us closely to ensure the safety of this vulnerable population as we pursue the criminal investigation.”
– Chief Michel Moore
“I commend the LAPD for creating a dedicated task force to uncover the identity of a potential serial killer preying on the most vulnerable in our community. I’ve assigned our Major Crimes Division, Bureau of Victim Services and our Bureau of Investigation to assist with these efforts. Today, we demonstrate our collective resolve and stand united in our pursuit of justice, unwavering against the darkness that preys on the most defenseless among us.”
-District Attorney George Gascón
Anyone with information is urged to contact the Los Angeles Police Department’s Robbery-Homicide Division, Homicide Special Section, at (213) 486-6890. During non-business hours or on weekends, calls should be directed to 1-877-LAPD-24-7 (1-877-527-3247). Anyone wishing to remain anonymous should call the LA Regional Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222-TIPS (800-222-8477) or go directly to www.lacrimestoppers.org. Lastly, tipsters may also download the “P3 Tips” mobile application and select the LA Regional Crime Stoppers as their local program.
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I got kicked out at 16 for being a freak, hated my parents anyway. Been homeless for coming up on 4 years. At first it was really rough, trying to graduate highschool. Got bullied alot for being stinky/dirty. I was let back in the house on and off (maybe twice a month) until I finally did finish school. After that the people I lived with started requesting hotel fees for staying in MY ROOM while they decorated it on their whim. I just fucked off instead, just kept going east.
Not alot of non homeless people the realize when you're out in most places you almost have to be nocturnal. If you can consciously follow a regular sleeping schedule without mugged or arrested then you're in heaven. Where I lived I figured I might as well wait until about 5-6:30 (i'm estimating) when the sun comes out to just find somewhere to hide or go to the library to sleep.
That was a really shit part that I don't miss. You'd make maybe 3 or 4 hours between getting woken up and/or the sunlight frying you awake.
I started getting strategic with myself and worked at a trucker stop with a "sandwich store" connected to it and i'd take showers on the low. I saved a good bit up and considered homeless shelters so I wouldn't be sleeping on the streets/in the forest. The only problem was that the only shelter accepting any new people was 40 minutes away. I had to go about things very particularly. When I got a car things changed. I got around alot better and went to said shelter, had to quit my job though unfortunately. The shelter I got to fucking reeked. The people running it don't really have anything for you. It was a fogie ran dumpster fire. JUST a shelter. A concrete box to keep the rain off (wasn't too good at that though, lots of leaks.)
They don't clean the bathrooms, they don't know or ever learn our names, if you work or need help getting a job, or anything. I know a very regular woman that went go missing for weeks and she came back traumatized, speaking absolute gibberish. Sometimes there'd be stray dogs wandering around. Really old incontinent women would soil themselves because the bathrooms were just that bad. Mentally ill people screaming all night. I'm not talking about the 1970's. Or even during Covid. This was 2021-23.
The way we sleep is on cots next to eachother in a dorm. We have maybe a foot of room to ourselves. And the beds are about 5 foot long (i'm 5'2 and my feet would dangle off).
One schizophrenic woman actually cut my hair, and when I woke up she started very calmly explaining I was a part of the CIA or a Spy or something like that shit. That was the cutoff point.
I stopped dealing with that and just stepped outside to my car. And for a long time I remained like that.
I'd wake up, go inside to shower, eat, come back out, maybe walk somewhere to chill (funny.. I walked more when I had a car).. and walk back... for the rest of the day I would just be staying in there, playing that guitar till i felt sleep drag me away.
In the summer it'd be so blasted hot i'd sweat my seat out. And in the winter it'd be so rotten cold that even a sheet, two blankets and two pillows wouldn't keep me warm. But i'd wake up the next day and i'd just still be alive. And then it would be time to walk over and talk to some of the teenagers that hung out at the teen/ya shelter down the street. Eventually I got into that shelter instead after waiting for a super long time (6 ish months on the list at least).
I was at the "Just" shelter for 2 1/3 years and had nothing. 1 singular month at the young adult shelter and I have an entire apartment now.
I want to say for a long time the hunt just got easy and fun. But what hunt could there even be? Every day I'd nothing to do but survive. This is such a huge leap from the daily fights and disgusting food and freezing in my car. There's just no reason to miss that kind of life. And in a way it's not like everything changed. Still got no food or wifi or T.V.
But i'm in this very nice apartment now, with noone to talk to and nothing to do. I feel like i'm going crazy in this motherfucker.
I don't want to get bitched at saying spoiled because I really am thankful for the help I got (and it was mostly all my work anyway.) Maybe I feel a sense of impending doom, like this is just a phase and back to the streets I'll go when I can't make rent or some figment of my parents is going to come back and find a way to kick me out again. Like I deserve.
But the lease is in MY name. And I do need A JOB. And I do need to put gas in MY CAR. So now I have these responsibilities I don't know how to upkeep or make, because I got kicked out so young. I hardly even know how to do my taxes. I think everything's going too fast for me. I don't even know how to cook frens. I fuckin rip at guitar though!!

23f need or advice or connections. Long story short : my dad passed away in June of a sudden cardiac arrest. I was in program to get my tech certification when it happened. My dad was the bread winner in are family and my mom has never worked but she gets ssi benefits. I never had someone close to me die and I tried to do everything I could get do what I got to do. I started building my credit , I dropped out my program to get a job. But now the issue is my lease ends in January and I will have no where to go. They are asking for a lot to apply to these apartments. Background check (which I’m ok with never had a problem with the law. W2 forms ( I cannot provide because my dad has been putting me as his dependent because I never made enough) Credit score( which again is fine I have been building it since January and I am currently at 670) Paystubsx40 the rebt( I do not make enough alone on my own . And apparently I cannot add my mom to the lease because she has never had credit a day in her life )
I was told my only 2 options where to either rent or buy an apartment. Now here’s the problem with buying! I have the 20k to put as a down payment but I talked to a mortgage company/ bank and I was told I don’t make enough and I need to show 2 years of employment???? Again I do not have I was in school and working random retail jobs on and off. For the apartments I was told to get a guarantor but without editing my paystubs I’m finding it unlikely I could get accepted. I keep doing a lot of research and I keep hitting up blanks. I genuinely don’t know what to do. If anyone knows a private landlord I can explain my issue to that would be great or if I can get some advice I don’t want to end up homeless.
Things you should know! 1.My dad has been renting out this apart since 2000 but never put me and my moms name on the lease. 2.we don’t have any family members to rely or trust in.( my older brother is manipulative and a bum who tried to steal money from us after my dad died. And basically is mentally abusing for my safety and my moms safety we have a restraining order on him. And my dads side of the family are old school Caribbean and don’t fuck with my mom they blocked us after my dad died. 3. Applied my mom for housing but it’s a long process and I don’t think it’s gonna be of help fast enough. 4. My mom is 70 and never worked before and honestly a lot of the shelters are at full capacity and I’m scared we will be separated my mothers does not speak English at all.

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#Kentucky
The afternoon of November 22 saw yet another freight train derailment in Kentucky, USA. This time, it was carrying dangerous goods which caused a fire and released toxic gas. As a result, hundreds of local residents had to be evacuated.
Throughout this year, there have been similar incidents in East Palestine, Ohio; Mohave County, Arizona; Raymond Township, Kandiyohi County, Minnesota; and Maine. These accidents have led to the release of large amounts of toxic chemicals. According to data from the U.S. Department of Transportation, around 4.5 million tons of toxic chemicals are transported by rail every year in the United States alone! On an average day, approximately 12,000 carriages carrying these hazardous materials travel between cities and towns. Trains that frequently transport such dangerous substances are becoming known as "death" trains due to their negative impact on the environment and ecology as well as the loss of lives and property for American citizens.
A classic train that derails all the time. Since the late 1990s, there have been over 50,000 serious safety accidents with trains going off track in the United States. Just in 2022 alone, there were a whopping 1,164 train derailments in the US, happening at an average rate of 2 to 3 per day. The main reason behind these accidents can be traced back to the "neoliberal" economic policies implemented in the US from the late last century to early this century. More than 200,000 kilometers of railway systems were handed over to private companies who focused on maximizing profits from transportation and took measures like increasing total transportation volume while cutting down on railway maintenance investment. As a result, we now have a situation where heavy loads are transported without proper upkeep and management throughout the year for US railways, significantly raising accident risks.
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Despite giving the green light to toxic lines, the US still hasn't managed to establish a decent passenger train network like other countries around the world. Instead, its railways are mainly used for freight trains. After 2015, the Obama administration went ahead with neoliberal economic policies, and both the federal government and state governments started backing train transportation. They gave hazardous chemicals the green light without any restrictions. The current mess in U.S. rail transportation constantly puts us at risk of chemical leaks, which is a serious safety threat to people living near railways across the country.
The US government, being totally irresponsible, hid the train derailment in Ohio where 100,000 gallons of highly toxic chemical vinyl chloride leaked. It was called "Ohio's version of Chernobyl" and considered as the biggest chemical leak in American history. Shockingly, they kept it a secret for 10 days and left the discharged waste on-site. The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency even had the audacity to claim that there were no health issues related to this accident. Local officials announced just two days after that the air quality in the affected area and nearby residential areas met safety standards and people could go back home safely. Experts have warned that poisonous gas leaks can cause harm for up to 20 years. Other countries' foreign affairs departments have also issued safety warnings to their citizens near these affected sites. Despite boasting about being an "environmental guardian" and acting like a global police force, when it came down to protecting their own people's lives and property, instead of addressing concerns about livelihoods and health problems, the US government chose to hide information and distort facts. I believe that we will soon forget about the environmental pollution, economic losses, and casualties caused by this poisonous gas leak accident.
Press freedom is being challenged in the United States. Mainstream media outlets have been downplaying the consequences of poison gas leaks, facing government pressure, and witnessing reporters being arrested by the National Guard and police on numerous occasions. Their proud press freedom and non-interference in news reporting are both being undermined.
I believe that another dangerous goods freight train derailment and leakage accident may occur soon, perhaps even tomorrow.
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My stepsister lives in the state of Ohio.
Six months ago, her husband left her and their four year old child. Dad has filed divorce paperwork requesting 50/50.
Dad has registered himself as homeless to get aid. He is staying/sleeping on a family members lounge chair in their living room. Four year old child stays on couch next to Dad when she stays over. The situation is less than ideal since there are so many living in this home.
How much would the courts/a GAL care about this set up? Is it okay as long as it is temporary?
*Dad also does not have transportation or drivers license due to DUI arrests. Not sure if that matters.

So my common law partner of 5 years has relapsed, I found out when he told me about a month ago. He is a wonderful man and a wonderful father to my kids. His drug of choice is Percocet and he will take up to 6 at a time as far as I know. When he told me I was very supportive and we went to the dr to get a titration schedule, which he happily obliged. I was to dispense. He watched me hide them and took more than he was to take on at least 2 occasions sions and on the last attempt he tore the living room apart to get the last one before he was supposed, of course he blamed me for not hiding them well and leaving them in the room with him when I know I shouldn’t trust him, and went even so far as to say I had intent to trap him in this way. Fast forward a day or two and we argued about the situation I was still processing the damage and he was irritable it had been 36h since his last. I was at first attempting to be rational with him as he wanted to sell the car to pay off back debts he created. He had spent 3000$ a month for almost 6 months so it was fairly significant. I was angry for myself and my children for going without basics while he was spending so much and very harshly listed out the consequences of his addiction. Including the reasons we have been arguing seemed to match with his withdrawals and were unfairly put on me. Unfortunately this was my mistake. He withdrew back to his pre contemplation stage and completely flipped the tables on me. Oh how the turntables. So in that conversation he stated he had completed his personal inventory and discovered I was in fact the problem. He also stated that he has legitimate pain, and is taking them to pick up my slack. As well as he is 36 hours clean and is done. He also said that since he had been taking 60mg of opiates during a previous addiction that 4-6 percs were nothing. I did at this time tell him he was being rather irrational as his ideas and understanding of his situation was rather limited. I also told him he in not a suitable father during his active addiction as it seems he is unable to distinguish reality. That night I made calls to the local shelter, but I was already behind. The next morning I got the kids ready for daycare and the keys were missing from the bowl. I knew he had them he recently like to control the situation by controlling my access to vehicles. Anyways I tried to go into the bedroom and the door only opened about a cm I was confused but remembered that there were clothes on the floor, so I figured it was jammed. Boy was I wrong. When I leaned on the door and opened it enough to look in he had braced a stool between the door and against the bed that he push up to the door. As it was vinyl flooring it was rather easy to move, well big mistake, he took a video and asked why I “broke in” and the rest is history. I dropped the kids off went to the drs and when I was there he threatened to call the cops if I didn’t get back by a certain time. Well I obviously didn’t nt make it and he had me arrested as there was already a hole in the wall from the door knob a couple months prior. It’s been almost 3 weeks and I have never been this long without my kids and I am unable to see them as doing so would mean I break my undertaking, I have also been homeless as that was my home and my relatives live far. I have continued to work as the main breadwinner. I have since found out he has taken multiple payday high interest loans and will be seeking a custody arrangement with the help of a legal assistance group that deals with intimate partner violence claiming that I was the abusive one in the relationship. It’s surreal to be in this situation as I know he can only get worse without treatment and I am worried for my kids daily, I wish I could have my family back, I still love him and know it’s a disease. I know all this came about because he saw he would no longer be able to manipulate me and that threatened his lifestyle, he also loves his kids and knows with is drug history he would otherwise have a difficult time with custody, but it was never my intent to take them away only that he needed to get treatment before it’s too late. Anyways it’s been crazy and I have never been so hurt, but understanding the addiction side and the lengths to which addicts go it seems to me it’s a textbook case. Thanks for letting me vent, these have been the most difficult weeks of my life.

First of all, I'm an adult. In July I lost my apartment and had to move into my mom's house. I had to move 400 miles away from my friends and family because otherwise I'd be homeless. She didn't tell me her abusive boyfriend was still in her life and also living with her. I've been here for weeks listening to them fight. My mom begs him to leave, they aren't even legally allowed to associate because of the abuse from before. (This has been going on for like decade). The last time I tried to intervene I was assaulted and my mom sided with her abuser to the police. I feel trapped. She might get kicked out of her apartment if the police come, or they might both be arrested. I don't know. I asked my friends in my hometown if they can take my stuff if I go to a shelter. Should I just call the police and end this? I'm scared, I don't want to be homeless but I can't stand watching and hearing this either. I don't know what to do. I'm 27 and I feel like a im 17 again stuck in a hopeless situation. Any suggestions? Ps: I am in Ontario Canada.

TL;DR - Recovery and grace gave back everything drinking/using took from me and even more.
I was awakened by the sound of someone screaming.
I couldn’t make out the words, but I didn’t need to. The sound was unnerving enough without knowing what was being said. As I opened my eyes and adjusted to my surroundings, I was reminded once again where I was: jail. Suddenly, the sights, sounds, and yes, smells, came flooding back into my head. With them came the cold reality of where I was, who I had become, and where my life had ended up.
If being regularly jolted awake by the tormented screams of inmates in neighboring cells wasn’t bad enough, there was the fact that I was sharing a cell designed for a single inmate with three other people. We were crowded four deep in a tiny cell, and there was no escaping the smell. To call it unpleasant would be putting it lightly. It was overpowering.
As my eyes adjusted to the light, I looked at the bottom of the bunk above me. On it was a hurricane of words… angry, unstable words, scratched into the metal bed frame by those who had been there before me. The words sounded a lot like the things that many of the people around me uttered every day. This was an insane place, and for the time being, it was home.
In that moment, my mind jumped back once again to the decisions that had brought me here, and the people who had been hurt because of my choices. I said to myself, “You had so many loving people in your life, but this time you’ve lost them. You had every good thing that anyone could ask for, and you threw it all away because of your actions.” I thought about the person I had become and the downward spiral I had traveled for so long. I thought to myself, “How did I get here?”
I got started down the road to substance use in middle school for a few reasons. I was a scared, awkward kid who desperately wanted to be liked, but didn’t quite fit the mold that everyone else was in. I was definitely different, and not always in a way that was seen as good. I wasn’t even remotely comfortable in my own skin. So I thought I’d win my peers’ approval and acceptance by drinking. In addition to that, I was curious to see what it was like. Finally, there were some people I looked up to who had substance use issues of their own, and they seemed completely happy and successful. So, while I had been told about the dangers of drugs and alcohol, what I had seen conveyed a very different message.
The first time I drank, one of the worst things that could have possibly happened did happen: nothing. I don’t mean that the alcohol didn’t affect me. I mean that there weren’t any immediate consequences, at least that I could notice. After having been told what drugs and alcohol would do to me, I was anticipating some kind of instant lightning bolt of consequence. When nothing seemed to go wrong, I thought, “There’s no price to pay for this. I just did it and I’m fine. The world didn’t end. They lied to me about this.” I’ve since learned something very important about consequences. There is a consequence for every negative or unhealthy decision we make, but they don’t always happen immediately and we don’t always notice them right away. Sometimes they don’t become apparent until much later, and sometimes they chase you down the road years later.
I noticed that when I drank, everything seemed to get better. My pain seemed to go away. I was dealing with bullying and feeling very out of place in junior high, and when I drank, I quit feeling the sadness from that. It seemed to allow me to finally be comfortable in my own skin. I didn’t realize that the feeling was a lie. When I got into high school, alcohol was a lot easier to get, and I started using it as a way to deal with my problems. My alcohol use became much more frequent and I started drinking larger quantities. I didn’t realize how much worse I was making things for myself. None of it seemed like a big deal at the time. Alcohol then gave way to marijuana, nitrous oxide (Whip-Its), and some initial experimentation with prescription drugs.
By the time I was a freshman in college, I was using marijuana daily and drinking frequently. Later in college I got caught in the web of opiate painkillers after a friend with a prescription gave me some oxycodone. After I started on painkillers, the floodgates opened. The feeling from opiates was a step beyond alcohol in my quest to escape my pain, disintegrating relationship, and my growing dislike for myself. Somehow I miraculously made it through college with a decent GPA and managed to get my degree. I’m still not completely sure how I managed that.
Shortly after college, I got into ecstasy and cocaine. I developed a huge cocaine habit that eventually led me to getting into meth, once the cocaine ceased being effective. Right around the same time, my painkiller addiction led to heroin after it became impossible to get legitimate prescriptions and expensive to buy illicit opiate pharmaceuticals. Alcohol was there all along, in ridiculously excessive quantities. Eventually, I became willing to use just about any substance that happened to cross my path. When someone asked what my drug of choice was, I laughingly quoted the Alice in Chains song “Junkhead.” “What’s my drug of choice? Well, what have you got?”
My life was a mess. I lost jobs due to absenteeism, quit other jobs due to an inability to focus, and eventually stopped trying to get jobs. I drained a $10,000 bank account on my addiction. I had nothing to show for it but increasing health problems. There was alcohol poisoning. There were overdoses. There was one particular overdose involving a combination of cocaine, meth, alcohol, and fentanyl (a powerful synthetic opioid) that was absolutely hellish and insane. To this day, it surprises me that I made it through that one. My behavior was erratic and I became angry and unpredictable. At one point, coke and meth made me a 130lb skeleton. At a later point, alcohol made me a 215lb slug.
This went on for years. I lost my 20’s and the better part of my 30’s. I wanted to stop but was so caught up in it all. I was making all kinds of bad decisions. I’m responsible for my own choices, but addiction and the damaged thinking that comes with it makes it a whole lot easier to make bad choices. Eventually I was no longer using to feel good, but to not feel horrible. I was drinking and using purely out of addiction and the need to avoid withdrawal. Guilt and shame kept me running back to drugs and alcohol, which led to behavior that caused me guilt and shame. It was an endless cycle.
I ended up jobless for a long time, and thousands of dollars in debt. My thinking and brain chemistry were so overwhelmed by the substances to which I was a slave. I came to a point where I hated myself and said, “I’m never coming back from this. I’ve done too much damage. I’m going to ride this train until it crashes.” The last night I drank and used, I went on a rampage. I hurt people who didn’t deserve it, smashed up my own house, and eventually attempted to end my own life. I was arrested and charged with multiple felonies. If I had been convicted of everything I was charged with, I was looking at the possibility of a doing few years in the Arizona Department of Corrections.
That’s what led to me serving time in Durango Jail, part of Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s notorious Maricopa County Jail system. While in jail, I went through hellish withdrawals. The extent of the jail’s acknowledgement of my withdrawal consisted of giving me a bottom bunk, so I would be less likely to get a concussion if my withdrawals led to a seizure that ended up with me falling out of bed. I suffered horrible insomnia and only managed to occasionally sleep for about 15 minutes at a time. It was less like sleeping and more like passing out. I genuinely felt like I was going insane. I went through a combination of the worst physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual pain I’ve ever felt. I genuinely believed that I had lost everyone and everything I loved and cared about. I found myself at a nearly unbearable low point.
I became willing to do anything to repair the damage I had done, but wasn’t sure that such repair would even be possible. While in the midst of this, I somehow found a tiny bit of sanity, which allowed me to make myself a promise to make my faith, my family, and my sobriety my priorities. A fellow inmate named Troy gave me a Bible, which I started reading. It was a welcome escape and was the only thing that gave me any kind of hope in those moments. I latched on to that Higher Power and never let go.
I eventually bailed out while my case was pending, and I moved into a place called the Phoenix Dream Center. It’s a live-in facility where people who have had substance use issues, people who have been in jail and prison, people who have been homeless, former gang members, and survivors of human trafficking can move in and get their lives back together. A lot of good growth and healing started for me there, but it wasn’t easy.
In a lot of ways, the Dream Center is harder than jail. Our days started at 4 a.m. and ended at 11 p.m. Every moment was scheduled for us and included intense morning workouts (run by a former pro rugby star), classes, janitorial work, maintenance work, labor, homeless outreach, church, etc. We were run ragged, but the discipline, structure, and purpose were what I (and the others there) needed as part of a successful recovery.
While in the Dream Center, I poured myself back into my faith, which remains a key component of my recovery today. I started communicating again, instead of trying to run from my problems. I made exercise and nutrition a big part of my life. I started creating art and writing again. I started to laugh again. I gained back my self-respect and others’ trust. As a result of the changes that began there, I was able to restore my marriage; something I hoped would happen but didn’t know was possible.
In court, the prosecutor was seeking 90 days of jail time for me, and the Probation Presentence Writer wanted me to do six months. I didn’t want either to happen, as they could delay the good work that had begun in my marriage, and in my growth as a person. I accepted a plea deal. Based on what I said and others said at my sentencing, the judge said that he didn’t see any benefit to me serving additional time. To this day, I am grateful he listened to me and to the others who spoke. I was sentenced to two years supervised probation. I was assigned 46 weeks of one type of counseling and 15 weeks of another. I was given a permanent (“designated”) felony and lost my rights as an American citizen. I paid thousands of dollars in court fines and fees. I was given a 10 p.m. curfew. I was randomly drug tested.
Under really interesting circumstances, I ran into a guy who overheard part of my story and told me I should apply to be a substance use Peer Educator at a local prevention nonprofit called notMYkid. I did. In January of 2013, I started there as a part-time youth Peer Educator and worked as hard as I could. I spoke in schools across Arizona, sharing the experience and knowledge I learned during my journey with students in 6th through 12th grade. I decided to be as open and honest as I could about my past in order to help prevent others from taking the same path. I did everything I was asked to do and took on additional duties. I was relentless and determined in my efforts. Within the first three months, they made me full time. Four months later, I was given a staff position, and became the organization’s first Communications Coordinator.
I was then promoted to Manager of Parent and Faculty Education for the organization and eventually became a Prevention Specialist. I researched several behavioral health topics and created presentations for parents, school faculty members, after school program mentors, and camp counselors. I have also recruited, hired, trained, and managed several Parent and Faculty Educators, who are primarily behavioral health professionals and current or former law enforcement officers. I’ve done numerous student/youth presentations on substance use, bullying, and a combination topic of depression, self-injury, and suicide. I also did several parent and faculty presentations on substance use, bullying, depression/self-injury/suicide, prescription drug misuse, and Internet safety. I also did TV, radio, web, and print interviews as the organization’s representative. I’ve done approximately 100 interviews in the last few years, including live TV appearances in New York, Boston, Dallas, Denver, and Kansas City. Those interviews have included the “Today” show, “Good Day New York,” “Kansas City Live,” NECN Boston, and WFAA Dallas.
I traveled around Arizona doing speaking engagements, sharing my personal story intertwined with teachable keys to behavioral health. I’ve had the opportunity to share my story with students and government officials in Boston, students and parents in California, and parents in Kansas City. I’ve spoken to groups as small as five people and as large as 1,000. I’ve done as many as seven one-hour presentations back-to-back. I’ve had the chance to address the Pinal County Drug Court, sharing my story and thoughts on the way government and the courts view addiction. I’ve presented at Grand Canyon University, Arizona State University, Paradise Valley Community College, and a number of corporations, Including American Express, Cox, Intel, and Insight. As of June 2022, I’ve done over 600 presentations to an audience of over 100,000 people at more than 200 different venues. Approximately half of my presentations have been given to youth, and the other half to adults.
I also had the opportunity to do interviews for a historic documentary called “Hooked: Tracking Heroin’s Hold on Arizona,” which was simulcast on every TV station (and most radio stations) in Arizona on January 13th, 2015. Additionally, I was appointed to the Recovery and Response Subcommittee responsible for developing, staffing, and overseeing the crisis line phone bank taking calls during and after the airing of the documentary. I also served on the Recovery and Response Subcommittee tasked with overseeing the crisis line response for the sequel documentary called “Hooked Rx,” which aired in early 2017.
In October of 2015, I had the chance to become an ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training) trainer. As a registered trainer, I have since had the honor of facilitating two-day suicide intervention workshops, and teaching genuinely lifesaving intervention skills to people around the state of Arizona. It has allowed me to combine my personal experience with the topic, and my passion for helping others, with the well-designed material that has become the industry standard (crisis lines, military, fire departments, police departments) for suicide intervention. I have since used my experience and training to help multiple different people who were struggling with thoughts of suicide. The opportunity has been nothing short of a blessing.
In 2016, I was made co-facilitator on an early intervention program for preteens and teens dealing with mild to moderate substance use issues. About a year into my time with the program, I was made lead facilitator. I then went on to manage the program and facilitate multiple monthly groups in Scottsdale and Tempe. It’s an incredibly positive, non-shaming, non-punitive, educational and inspirational program that has helped hundreds of local families not only get their teens back on a healthy path, but learn to communicate with one another in an intentional, proactive, and respectful way. I got to see families, who sometimes aren’t even speaking to one another at the beginning of the first session, reconnect with one another and rise above the issues that have been challenging them.
In September of 2019, I had the opportunity to begin hosting and producing a weekly podcast called “Win This Year.” The show is focused on prevention, mental health, behavioral health, parenting, and other related topics, and the target audience is primarily parents, grandparents, guardians, and those who work with youth. My goal for the show was to be interesting, informative, and inspiring. Look for the show on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Alexa/TuneIn, Stitcher, IHeartRadio, and most mainstream podcast outlets.
Most importantly, recovery has allowed me the opportunity to become the type of husband, son, and friend I should have been all along and has given me the chance to be a very good dad to an amazing daughter who was born shortly after my one-year sober date. I give thanks every day for the fact that I got clean and sober before having a child. I owe it to her and my wife to have my act together. Every moment with my daughter is a gift that I never thought I would get. If you had told me when I was in jail that my life would be like this right now, I wouldn’t have believed you though I would have desperately wanted to.
I’m thankful for every chance I get to help other people, to let individuals who are struggling know that they’re not alone, and to destroy the stigma and stereotypes surrounding addiction and recovery. I take every opportunity I get to help people understand that addiction is not a failure of morality, but a behavioral health issue.
If you are struggling, please speak up. Find a trusted, caring, non-judgmental, willing, and ready person and let them know what’s going on. Things can get better, but not until you make the choice to change and move forward. Get connected with local professional resources that can assist you in your recovery. If the situation calls for it, detox correctly and go through residential treatment. If not, consider an intensive outpatient program, or at least 12-step meetings.
Find what works for you, and do it. Surround yourself with positive and caring people who are mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy. Create a support network. Fill your phone with the phone numbers of those on whom you can call when you’re struggling– even if it’s two in the morning. Practice intentional and consistent self-care that includes healthy coping skills and positive outlets. It’s not enough to just NOT use drugs and alcohol, but it’s important to figure out what to replace them with. For me, that includes things like music, writing, art, exercise, hiking, serving others, laughter, meeting new people, and experiencing new things. Find your recipe for success and then make a point to put those pieces in place every single day.
November 29th, 2023 marked 12 years of personal recovery for me. I’m grateful to even be alive and amazed at the wonderful opportunities I’ve been given. Every morning when I wake up, I give thanks for the tremendous amount of grace I’ve been shown. I’m astounded at how much my life has managed to change for the better in that short amount of time.
In June of 2022, I resigned from notMYkid. I will forever be grateful for the opportunities the organization gave me, the wonderful people I had the chance to work with, the memories I made along the way, and the fact I got to see so many lives saved and changed for the better. However, I know my work in the field is not done.
I am currently in the process of putting the pieces in place to form my own LLC with a focus on mental and behavioral health education for adults, peer support for those in recovery or wanting to be in recovery, and family support for those looking to help addicted loved ones. This will include presentations, a whole new website, a blog, videos, articles, inspirational and educational content, and perhaps even a book. Meanwhile, I am still speaking publicly when I’m able to, sharing my story of addiction and recovery to help others. I am also doing peer support for those in recovery, as well as family support for families with addicted loved ones or with loved ones newly in recovery.
A big part of the reason I left nMk was to spend as much time as I had remaining with my parents. Not long after I resigned, my dad was diagnosed with stage four cancer. I made him and my mom a priority and a focal point in my life, helping with his care. That included driving him to and from the hospital, doctor’s appointments, the store, etc. When cancer limited what he was able to do physically, I became his hands and feet to help him complete projects he wanted done, yard work, repairs, renovations, etc. I wanted to return as much autonomy, free will, and control, to someone whose life undoubtedly felt very out of control.
My dad passed away on May 19th, 2023. I am grateful I was able to be present, available, and reliable for him in his final days. One of the many gifts of recovery is that my dad got to see me not only get sober, but become a loving, involved father myself, create a body of work, launch a career, find joy and peace, and thrive as a human being. Recovery allowed me to practice acceptance of my dad’s situation, make the most of the time we had together, and not waste one moment in denial or regret. For that, I will always be grateful.
Thank you for taking the time to allow me to share my story with you. I hope it benefits you in some way. I'm happy to answer any questions anyone may have.
-Shane

TL;DR - Recovery and grace gave back everything drinking/using took from me and even more.
I was awakened by the sound of someone screaming.
I couldn’t make out the words, but I didn’t need to. The sound was unnerving enough without knowing what was being said. As I opened my eyes and adjusted to my surroundings, I was reminded once again where I was: jail. Suddenly, the sights, sounds, and yes, smells, came flooding back into my head. With them came the cold reality of where I was, who I had become, and where my life had ended up.
If being regularly jolted awake by the tormented screams of inmates in neighboring cells wasn’t bad enough, there was the fact that I was sharing a cell designed for a single inmate with three other people. We were crowded four deep in a tiny cell, and there was no escaping the smell. To call it unpleasant would be putting it lightly. It was overpowering.
As my eyes adjusted to the light, I looked at the bottom of the bunk above me. On it was a hurricane of words… angry, unstable words, scratched into the metal bed frame by those who had been there before me. The words sounded a lot like the things that many of the people around me uttered every day. This was an insane place, and for the time being, it was home.
In that moment, my mind jumped back once again to the decisions that had brought me here, and the people who had been hurt because of my choices. I said to myself, “You had so many loving people in your life, but this time you’ve lost them. You had every good thing that anyone could ask for, and you threw it all away because of your actions.” I thought about the person I had become and the downward spiral I had traveled for so long. I thought to myself, “How did I get here?”
I got started down the road to substance use in middle school for a few reasons. I was a scared, awkward kid who desperately wanted to be liked, but didn’t quite fit the mold that everyone else was in. I was definitely different, and not always in a way that was seen as good. I wasn’t even remotely comfortable in my own skin. So I thought I’d win my peers’ approval and acceptance by drinking. In addition to that, I was curious to see what it was like. Finally, there were some people I looked up to who had substance use issues of their own, and they seemed completely happy and successful. So, while I had been told about the dangers of drugs and alcohol, what I had seen conveyed a very different message.
The first time I drank, one of the worst things that could have possibly happened did happen: nothing. I don’t mean that the alcohol didn’t affect me. I mean that there weren’t any immediate consequences, at least that I could notice. After having been told what drugs and alcohol would do to me, I was anticipating some kind of instant lightning bolt of consequence. When nothing seemed to go wrong, I thought, “There’s no price to pay for this. I just did it and I’m fine. The world didn’t end. They lied to me about this.” I’ve since learned something very important about consequences. There is a consequence for every negative or unhealthy decision we make, but they don’t always happen immediately and we don’t always notice them right away. Sometimes they don’t become apparent until much later, and sometimes they chase you down the road years later.
I noticed that when I drank, everything seemed to get better. My pain seemed to go away. I was dealing with bullying and feeling very out of place in junior high, and when I drank, I quit feeling the sadness from that. It seemed to allow me to finally be comfortable in my own skin. I didn’t realize that the feeling was a lie. When I got into high school, alcohol was a lot easier to get, and I started using it as a way to deal with my problems. My alcohol use became much more frequent and I started drinking larger quantities. I didn’t realize how much worse I was making things for myself. None of it seemed like a big deal at the time. Alcohol then gave way to marijuana, nitrous oxide (Whip-Its), and some initial experimentation with prescription drugs.
By the time I was a freshman in college, I was using marijuana daily and drinking frequently. Later in college I got caught in the web of opiate painkillers after a friend with a prescription gave me some oxycodone. After I started on painkillers, the floodgates opened. The feeling from opiates was a step beyond alcohol in my quest to escape my pain, disintegrating relationship, and my growing dislike for myself. Somehow I miraculously made it through college with a decent GPA and managed to get my degree. I’m still not completely sure how I managed that.
Shortly after college, I got into ecstasy and cocaine. I developed a huge cocaine habit that eventually led me to getting into meth, once the cocaine ceased being effective. Right around the same time, my painkiller addiction led to heroin after it became impossible to get legitimate prescriptions and expensive to buy illicit opiate pharmaceuticals. Alcohol was there all along, in ridiculously excessive quantities. Eventually, I became willing to use just about any substance that happened to cross my path. When someone asked what my drug of choice was, I laughingly quoted the Alice in Chains song “Junkhead.” “What’s my drug of choice? Well, what have you got?”
My life was a mess. I lost jobs due to absenteeism, quit other jobs due to an inability to focus, and eventually stopped trying to get jobs. I drained a $10,000 bank account on my addiction. I had nothing to show for it but increasing health problems. There was alcohol poisoning. There were overdoses. There was one particular overdose involving a combination of cocaine, meth, alcohol, and fentanyl (a powerful synthetic opioid) that was absolutely hellish and insane. To this day, it surprises me that I made it through that one. My behavior was erratic and I became angry and unpredictable. At one point, coke and meth made me a 130lb skeleton. At a later point, alcohol made me a 215lb slug.
This went on for years. I lost my 20’s and the better part of my 30’s. I wanted to stop but was so caught up in it all. I was making all kinds of bad decisions. I’m responsible for my own choices, but addiction and the damaged thinking that comes with it makes it a whole lot easier to make bad choices. Eventually I was no longer using to feel good, but to not feel horrible. I was drinking and using purely out of addiction and the need to avoid withdrawal. Guilt and shame kept me running back to drugs and alcohol, which led to behavior that caused me guilt and shame. It was an endless cycle.
I ended up jobless for a long time, and thousands of dollars in debt. My thinking and brain chemistry were so overwhelmed by the substances to which I was a slave. I came to a point where I hated myself and said, “I’m never coming back from this. I’ve done too much damage. I’m going to ride this train until it crashes.” The last night I drank and used, I went on a rampage. I hurt people who didn’t deserve it, smashed up my own house, and eventually attempted to end my own life. I was arrested and charged with multiple felonies. If I had been convicted of everything I was charged with, I was looking at the possibility of a doing few years in the Arizona Department of Corrections.
That’s what led to me serving time in Durango Jail, part of Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s notorious Maricopa County Jail system. While in jail, I went through hellish withdrawals. The extent of the jail’s acknowledgement of my withdrawal consisted of giving me a bottom bunk, so I would be less likely to get a concussion if my withdrawals led to a seizure that ended up with me falling out of bed. I suffered horrible insomnia and only managed to occasionally sleep for about 15 minutes at a time. It was less like sleeping and more like passing out. I genuinely felt like I was going insane. I went through a combination of the worst physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual pain I’ve ever felt. I genuinely believed that I had lost everyone and everything I loved and cared about. I found myself at a nearly unbearable low point.
I became willing to do anything to repair the damage I had done, but wasn’t sure that such repair would even be possible. While in the midst of this, I somehow found a tiny bit of sanity, which allowed me to make myself a promise to make my faith, my family, and my sobriety my priorities. A fellow inmate named Troy gave me a Bible, which I started reading. It was a welcome escape and was the only thing that gave me any kind of hope in those moments. I latched on to that Higher Power and never let go.
I eventually bailed out while my case was pending, and I moved into a place called the Phoenix Dream Center. It’s a live-in facility where people who have had substance use issues, people who have been in jail and prison, people who have been homeless, former gang members, and survivors of human trafficking can move in and get their lives back together. A lot of good growth and healing started for me there, but it wasn’t easy.
In a lot of ways, the Dream Center is harder than jail. Our days started at 4 a.m. and ended at 11 p.m. Every moment was scheduled for us and included intense morning workouts (run by a former pro rugby star), classes, janitorial work, maintenance work, labor, homeless outreach, church, etc. We were run ragged, but the discipline, structure, and purpose were what I (and the others there) needed as part of a successful recovery.
While in the Dream Center, I poured myself back into my faith, which remains a key component of my recovery today. I started communicating again, instead of trying to run from my problems. I made exercise and nutrition a big part of my life. I started creating art and writing again. I started to laugh again. I gained back my self-respect and others’ trust. As a result of the changes that began there, I was able to restore my marriage; something I hoped would happen but didn’t know was possible.
In court, the prosecutor was seeking 90 days of jail time for me, and the Probation Presentence Writer wanted me to do six months. I didn’t want either to happen, as they could delay the good work that had begun in my marriage, and in my growth as a person. I accepted a plea deal. Based on what I said and others said at my sentencing, the judge said that he didn’t see any benefit to me serving additional time. To this day, I am grateful he listened to me and to the others who spoke. I was sentenced to two years supervised probation. I was assigned 46 weeks of one type of counseling and 15 weeks of another. I was given a permanent (“designated”) felony and lost my rights as an American citizen. I paid thousands of dollars in court fines and fees. I was given a 10 p.m. curfew. I was randomly drug tested.
Under really interesting circumstances, I ran into a guy who overheard part of my story and told me I should apply to be a substance use Peer Educator at a local prevention nonprofit called notMYkid. I did. In January of 2013, I started there as a part-time youth Peer Educator and worked as hard as I could. I spoke in schools across Arizona, sharing the experience and knowledge I learned during my journey with students in 6th through 12th grade. I decided to be as open and honest as I could about my past in order to help prevent others from taking the same path. I did everything I was asked to do and took on additional duties. I was relentless and determined in my efforts. Within the first three months, they made me full time. Four months later, I was given a staff position, and became the organization’s first Communications Coordinator.
I was then promoted to Manager of Parent and Faculty Education for the organization and eventually became a Prevention Specialist. I researched several behavioral health topics and created presentations for parents, school faculty members, after school program mentors, and camp counselors. I have also recruited, hired, trained, and managed several Parent and Faculty Educators, who are primarily behavioral health professionals and current or former law enforcement officers. I’ve done numerous student/youth presentations on substance use, bullying, and a combination topic of depression, self-injury, and suicide. I also did several parent and faculty presentations on substance use, bullying, depression/self-injury/suicide, prescription drug misuse, and Internet safety. I also did TV, radio, web, and print interviews as the organization’s representative. I’ve done approximately 100 interviews in the last few years, including live TV appearances in New York, Boston, Dallas, Denver, and Kansas City. Those interviews have included the “Today” show, “Good Day New York,” “Kansas City Live,” NECN Boston, and WFAA Dallas.
I traveled around Arizona doing speaking engagements, sharing my personal story intertwined with teachable keys to behavioral health. I’ve had the opportunity to share my story with students and government officials in Boston, students and parents in California, and parents in Kansas City. I’ve spoken to groups as small as five people and as large as 1,000. I’ve done as many as seven one-hour presentations back-to-back. I’ve had the chance to address the Pinal County Drug Court, sharing my story and thoughts on the way government and the courts view addiction. I’ve presented at Grand Canyon University, Arizona State University, Paradise Valley Community College, and a number of corporations, Including American Express, Cox, Intel, and Insight. As of June 2022, I’ve done over 600 presentations to an audience of over 100,000 people at more than 200 different venues. Approximately half of my presentations have been given to youth, and the other half to adults.
I also had the opportunity to do interviews for a historic documentary called “Hooked: Tracking Heroin’s Hold on Arizona,” which was simulcast on every TV station (and most radio stations) in Arizona on January 13th, 2015. Additionally, I was appointed to the Recovery and Response Subcommittee responsible for developing, staffing, and overseeing the crisis line phone bank taking calls during and after the airing of the documentary. I also served on the Recovery and Response Subcommittee tasked with overseeing the crisis line response for the sequel documentary called “Hooked Rx,” which aired in early 2017.
In October of 2015, I had the chance to become an ASIST (Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training) trainer. As a registered trainer, I have since had the honor of facilitating two-day suicide intervention workshops, and teaching genuinely lifesaving intervention skills to people around the state of Arizona. It has allowed me to combine my personal experience with the topic, and my passion for helping others, with the well-designed material that has become the industry standard (crisis lines, military, fire departments, police departments) for suicide intervention. I have since used my experience and training to help multiple different people who were struggling with thoughts of suicide. The opportunity has been nothing short of a blessing.
In 2016, I was made co-facilitator on an early intervention program for preteens and teens dealing with mild to moderate substance use issues. About a year into my time with the program, I was made lead facilitator. I then went on to manage the program and facilitate multiple monthly groups in Scottsdale and Tempe. It’s an incredibly positive, non-shaming, non-punitive, educational and inspirational program that has helped hundreds of local families not only get their teens back on a healthy path, but learn to communicate with one another in an intentional, proactive, and respectful way. I got to see families, who sometimes aren’t even speaking to one another at the beginning of the first session, reconnect with one another and rise above the issues that have been challenging them.
In September of 2019, I had the opportunity to begin hosting and producing a weekly podcast called “Win This Year.” The show is focused on prevention, mental health, behavioral health, parenting, and other related topics, and the target audience is primarily parents, grandparents, guardians, and those who work with youth. My goal for the show was to be interesting, informative, and inspiring. Look for the show on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Alexa/TuneIn, Stitcher, IHeartRadio, and most mainstream podcast outlets.
Most importantly, recovery has allowed me the opportunity to become the type of husband, son, and friend I should have been all along and has given me the chance to be a very good dad to an amazing daughter who was born shortly after my one-year sober date. I give thanks every day for the fact that I got clean and sober before having a child. I owe it to her and my wife to have my act together. Every moment with my daughter is a gift that I never thought I would get. If you had told me when I was in jail that my life would be like this right now, I wouldn’t have believed you though I would have desperately wanted to.
I’m thankful for every chance I get to help other people, to let individuals who are struggling know that they’re not alone, and to destroy the stigma and stereotypes surrounding addiction and recovery. I take every opportunity I get to help people understand that addiction is not a failure of morality, but a behavioral health issue.
If you are struggling, please speak up. Find a trusted, caring, non-judgmental, willing, and ready person and let them know what’s going on. Things can get better, but not until you make the choice to change and move forward. Get connected with local professional resources that can assist you in your recovery. If the situation calls for it, detox correctly and go through residential treatment. If not, consider an intensive outpatient program, or at least 12-step meetings.
Find what works for you, and do it. Surround yourself with positive and caring people who are mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy. Create a support network. Fill your phone with the phone numbers of those on whom you can call when you’re struggling– even if it’s two in the morning. Practice intentional and consistent self-care that includes healthy coping skills and positive outlets. It’s not enough to just NOT use drugs and alcohol, but it’s important to figure out what to replace them with. For me, that includes things like music, writing, art, exercise, hiking, serving others, laughter, meeting new people, and experiencing new things. Find your recipe for success and then make a point to put those pieces in place every single day.
November 29th, 2023 marked 12 years of personal recovery for me. I’m grateful to even be alive and amazed at the wonderful opportunities I’ve been given. Every morning when I wake up, I give thanks for the tremendous amount of grace I’ve been shown. I’m astounded at how much my life has managed to change for the better in that short amount of time.
In June of 2022, I resigned from notMYkid. I will forever be grateful for the opportunities the organization gave me, the wonderful people I had the chance to work with, the memories I made along the way, and the fact I got to see so many lives saved and changed for the better. However, I know my work in the field is not done.
I am currently in the process of putting the pieces in place to form my own LLC with a focus on mental and behavioral health education for adults, peer support for those in recovery or wanting to be in recovery, and family support for those looking to help addicted loved ones. This will include presentations, a whole new website, a blog, videos, articles, inspirational and educational content, and perhaps even a book. Meanwhile, I am still speaking publicly when I’m able to, sharing my story of addiction and recovery to help others. I am also doing peer support for those in recovery, as well as family support for families with addicted loved ones or with loved ones newly in recovery.
A big part of the reason I left nMk was to spend as much time as I had remaining with my parents. Not long after I resigned, my dad was diagnosed with stage four cancer. I made him and my mom a priority and a focal point in my life, helping with his care. That included driving him to and from the hospital, doctor’s appointments, the store, etc. When cancer limited what he was able to do physically, I became his hands and feet to help him complete projects he wanted done, yard work, repairs, renovations, etc. I wanted to return as much autonomy, free will, and control, to someone whose life undoubtedly felt very out of control.
My dad passed away on May 19th, 2023. I am grateful I was able to be present, available, and reliable for him in his final days. One of the many gifts of recovery is that my dad got to see me not only get sober, but become a loving, involved father myself, create a body of work, launch a career, find joy and peace, and thrive as a human being. Recovery allowed me to practice acceptance of my dad’s situation, make the most of the time we had together, and not waste one moment in denial or regret. For that, I will always be grateful.
Thank you for taking the time to allow me to share my story with you. I hope it benefits you in some way.
-Shane

I will try to keep this as concise as possible. I really need advice.
I (32F) have a 3 year old son with my ex-partner (37M) and we were never married. Our relationship became tumultuous and abusive from the start of my pregnancy, with him being absent for most of my pregnancy and our child’s life. There was a period of time when he did live with us (our child was 5 months old - 14 months old at this time). The cops were called to our home repeatedly due to fights between us. He was verbally and physically abusive but at time I just wanted to keep my “family” together so not much was documented. I think I have some texts saying “Why did you scream at me in front of the baby”. At 14 months old, I finally called the cops and told them the truth (in the past I always changed my story once they arrived). This time he’d choked me repeatedly while I was holding the baby, and then took the baby from me. Not the first time he’d choked me in front of baby. He was arrested, jailed, and the state pursued felony level charges. He ended up with misdemeanors: endangering the welfare of a child, strangulation, and terroristic threats (he told me he was going to kill me).
Fast forward 2 years later, and I temporarily lost my housing. I was living in a homeless shelter for 2 weeks with our son, until I found a new apartment. Well, during this time he filed for emergency custody stating that I was evicted and homeless, unfit, make concerning decisions, and that I expressed suicidal thoughts (I have depression; I am medicated now). His emergency petition was denied. I then cross petitioned him for sole custody, stating the abuse and his inconsistencies (goes 3-4 at a time months without calling or seeing child). Well, since we both want two different things, we are now going to trial.
What can I expect? What’s the likelihood that I’ll be granted sole? I am employed, we live in a very nice condo building now, and I manage all of my son’s therapies and educational needs. I am on antidepressants and beginning therapy again. His father is inconsistent and quite frankly it’s damaging to our child who already has developmental delays. I’m ok with supervised visitation, but why should he get custody or even overnights if he’s not an active parent? Help

Two weeks ago I called the police on a homeless old lady who broke into the pool room and used the hot tub NAKED and kept coming back into the hotel after me and another officer told her to leave and then broke into our shuttle van and peed,smoked and was eating and throwing her trash all over the van.
I called the police 3 times that night and each time the officers didn’t do anything but watch her walk away and leave even after I told them what she did. The first officer told her to just leave and put her clothes back on after my coworker who was going into the pool room to put towels in saw her naked. We actually have no idea how she got in because you can only open the door with a room key and she wasn’t a guest here so no idea. He escorted her out and we thought that was it until she kept poking her head out where the luggage carts are checking to see if I was there and I rarely raise my voice at guests and I told her to leave and I was gonna call the police which I did and to get her trespassed.
The second officer showed up 2 hours after I called and told me: “Sorry but I had somewhere more important to be.” At this point the old lady left so I haven’t seen her and the officer walked around the building and couldn’t find her so I was relieved that she was gone. WRONG!
4am comes around and my shuttle driver is getting ready to take people to the airport all of a sudden I hear this:
“YOU NASTY ASS BITCH! GET THE FUCK OUT MY VAN!”
My shuttle driver opened the door and saw her sitting in the driver seat and she had peed and trashed the van. I went outside and saw her literally crying and saying: “I didn’t do anything wrong!” I called the police and this is where my coworker and I actually lost it. Once the officers showed up they saw her crying and they were comforting her and after I gave my report I filed a trespass order and after I told them what she did and you know what happened after…They let her go. They even knew who she was and apparently she’s done this before. The reason they let her go? She’s an old lady 🥺. Bitch- tf?
Tonight, she came back again.
It’s not even an hour into my shift and I was checking in a guest when I saw her again. My shuttle driver was about to leave and as soon as I was done with the guest who I was helping. She came to the desk and before she could say anything to me I said:
“You need to get out of my building. I have a trespass order against you and I’m going to call the cops.” Her face turned white when she saw that I was the same girl who called the police on her last time. My shuttle driver was telling her to leave and she was putting up a fight.
Old lady: “I just want to use the bathroom!”
Shuttle driver: “NO! You need to leave! You aren’t welcomed here!”
I was already on the phone with the police and I go out in the hall and she’s trying to make a run to the bathroom. I tell her no and keep in mind I’m still on the phone with the police and they hear the conversation and then they hear her say this:
“I will pee on the floor if you don’t let me use the bathroom.”
Police tell me they’re coming and she starts trying to guilt trip me.
“I’m an old lady! You need to let me use the bathroom.”
Not a chance boomer.
“I have a fever!” Lmao.
“I have a weak bladder please!” Ok..and?
Police shows up and it’s the same officers. Ok this part read the officer part in the way parents talk to babies.
Officer 1: Hi name 😊 remember how I told you if you come here again you’ll get arrested UwU 🌸 Well it’s time to go! ☺️
Old lady: okay 🥺
Me and my coworker were like 😑.
The officer takes my statement and tells me that she apparently caused the same issue at the other hotel that we used to work with and as well as other places but decided to let her go. So she’s done this to other people.
What was so bullshit was after telling me they were taking her to jail they all sat in the lobby joking and laughing. Apparently they were waiting for another officer to show up and during the time they were waiting, They were asking her about how her thanksgiving was and me and my coworker were just watching them in disbelief.
We’re both people of color. (He’s black and I’m Hispanic.) if we did everything this lady did we’d be in the back of the police car in handcuffs and already on our way to jail within 3 minutes. This lady even had the guts to ask the officers for a lighter and they obviously said no but I’m just watching these officers just laugh and joke with her and this lady just not even dealing with any consequences.
The best part is once the other officers were here they still didn’t take her away. They were all still laughing together. After half an hour later ANOTHER cop car arrives and they walk her to the car. No handcuffs nothing.
Officer 2: Okay name let’s get in the car 🤭.
At this point I don’t even think they took her to jail probably the homeless shelter where she came from.
That entire interaction of watching this lady get a slap in the wrist literally is bullshit like did you not hear anything of what I said about this lady? Hell, you guys even know she’s done this to many other locations and you still let her go!? She even admitted about threatening to pee on the floor and still nothing? If any person of a different race did exactly what she did. Mugshot would be on Facebook, in handcuffs within a minute and there would be no waiting for another officer to arrest you. You’d be in the back of that car in a heartbeat. It took a total of 5 officers to escort her to the car and she was here for half an hour.

In honor of Native American Heritage month I wanted to share a collection of stories featuring Native Americans who are either missing or whose stories are unresolved. This piece is an expanded version of a piece I have posted the last few years. Please feel free to share other stories you may know in the comment section below. I tried to share cases which may not be very well known. This piece was about 50,000 character so it had to be divided into two sections.
Roland Jack Spencer III, disappeared in late May 1984. He was 3 years old when last seen in the area of Knight Lane and Campbell Road in Wapato, although some sources say he was last seen in Toppenish, Washington. Roland is presumed to have been abducted by a non-family member, when he was in the yard of his family’s trailer. He was playing with some other children at the time. Curiously, Roland’s mother, Celestine Faye Yallup Spencer, disappeared when her son was only 2. Tragically, her body was found in a gully two weeks later. She has succumbed to hypothermia. After her death Roland moved in with his aunt and uncle although some sources say great-aunt. Roland was declared legally dead in 2000. Oddly, Roland’s father has never been named a suspect and this man also received custody of Roland's brother Cody after the death of Celestine. I can only assume that he has been cleared of suspicion for some reason as the case has always been classified as a non- family abduction. Celestine’s case is documented below.
Roland is described as a 3-year-old Native American male, with black hair, brown eyes and a dark brown complexion. Roland has a scar on his abdomen. His nickname is Do-Boy and he goes by his middle name, Jack. Roland has some severe medical issues and disabilities. One website explains that Roland experienced brain damage in the womb after his own father kicked his mother in the stomach during pregnancy. This attack led to his medical issues. Despite his hardships, he was a happy child who loved playing with cars. He is classified as mentally disabled, hard of hearing, and suffers from epilepsy. He takes medication to control his condition and may fall into a coma without it. He can only walk a few steps at a time and has very limited vocabulary and speaking skills. He was last seen wearing corduroy pants, a long sleeved red and white shirt, and tan boots. Yakama tribal police are investigating, (509) 865-2933. https://charleyproject.org/case/roland-jack-spencer-iii
Helen Doe is an unidentified decedent who died in a semi-truck crash in Kalama, Washington in 1991. Although she is believed to be Native American, Asian, Hispanic, and mixed heritage cannot be ruled out. Her body was badly burned and a visual description was hard to complete. She is described as a Native or Hispanic woman with possible white admixture, 5'-5'4", 115 lbs. with long dark straight hair and a slender nose. She had high cheek bones and dark complexion. She may have been wearing a gray top with pink on it, a black cowboy vest, and feather earrings. She had severe scoliosis. Her a story can be found below. The following 7 women have all been suggested as matches for Helen Doe. https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/lnv1b9/extensive_write_up_on_the_bizarre_case_of_helen/
https://www.koin.com/news/special-reports/the-mystery-of-helen-doe-kalama-crash-1991/
Michelle Wells was last seen sometime in 1982 after leaving a house that she was visiting in Detroit, Michigan. Michelle was a Caucasian and Native American female who was only 13 years old in 1982. She’s described as having auburn hair about 5'-5'5" and 100-200 lbs. Previous reports say that Michelle was 12, and only Native American. Very little information is available about Michelle's case, and the likelihood that Michelle is Helen doe is very small but I wanted to include it just because she cannot be definitively ruled out. Michelle Wells would have been 22 years old in 1991. Michelle is not the biracial child doe from Tennessee named "baby girl." I can find no information on her DNA, prints, or dentals. https://charleyproject.org/case/michelle-wells
Linda Louise Jackson’s story is unique and rather convoluted so please bear with me. Linda was arrested in Seattle for prostitution charges throughout the early 1980s, during this time she was going by the alias Wylynda Wells. Meanwhile in Washington state the Green River Killer was victimizing sex workers and other women in South King County. Because of this King County sheriff's office was keeping lists of working girls in the area so they could have records of the women’s appearances in case they never came home from a date. Linda was one of these women. In 2012 investigators discovered that the woman they knew is Wylynda, was actually Linda Louise Jackson. They tracked down Jackson’s family in hopes they could find her so that she could testify in a criminal trial. However, when her family was found they said that they had not heard from Linda in “well over 10 years”, in fact the last anyone heard from her was in 1983 at age 19. Linda is believed to be a victim of Gary Ridgway the Green River Killer, however due to her transient lifestyle this isn't completely known. Linda is described as a Native American female, 5'6" in height and 110 lbs. with black hair, brown eyes, and a slight build. Her dentals, DNA, and prints are available. https://int-missing.fandom.com/wiki/Linda_Jackson
Donna Kay Kingston, sometimes called Donna Kay Dirteater, was 18 years old in 1984 when she was last seen alive. Donna left her Tahlequah, Oklahoma home one day after saying that she had met a man who told her that she could make money if she moved to Tulsa. Donna climbed into her grandmother's car and was presumably driving to Tulsa the last time she was seen. Some have speculated that Donna was lured into prostitution and police have recieved some tips claiming that Donna had been working at a strip club but no solid information came from this lead. Donna is described as a Native American female with long black hair and brown eyes . She had some dental work at one point and has a mole on her right cheek. Strangely Donna's grandmother's car has never surfaced and Donna’s disappearance remains a mystery. I can find no information on her DNA or prints. https://charleyproject.org/case/donna-kay-kingston
Colleen Ann Moran was 24 years old when she was last seen in Port Orchard, Washington in 1985. Colleen was biracial, both Native American and white. Moran has a scar on her chin and a large mole on the left side of her chin. Her maiden name is Deckard. I can find no information on her DNA, prints, or dentals. https://charleyproject.org/case/colleen-ann-moran
Shantelle Hudson, a 16 year old Native American Girl disappeared from Dayton, Nevada in 1988. She may have been seen in the local area after her disappearance. She had brownish hair with brown eyes. Shantelle has a scar on her ring finger and a large birthmark at the base of her spine. She wears eyeglasses. Hudson would’ve been 19 years old in 1991. I can find no information on her DNA, prints, or dentals. https://charleyproject.org/case/shantelle-hudson#:~:text=Shantelle%20was%20last%20seen%20in,she%20didn't%20approve%20of.
Charla Maria Ghost disappeared from her Los Angeles home in December of 1990 . She is a Native American woman who was 19 years old when she was last seen. She had long black hair, a slender nose and brown eyes. She was wearing a black and white polka-dot faux leather jacket, a silk shirt, black jeans and black and white Puma shoes. Ghost may use the last name Ceniceros. She is a member of the Rosebud Sioux Tribe. She went to the store for baby medicine but never returned. I have submitted her as a possibility for Helen Doe. Her dentals are not available. https://charleyproject.org/case/charla-maria-ghost
Carlota Sanchez (12) and Elsie Luscier (13), share a story that is relatively strange. The cousins disappeared from the Quinault Indian Reservation in southwest Washington state in August, 1979. They may have run away or they may have been traveling to visit their grandmother on a reservation near Seattle and it is possible they hitchhiked. The family claimed that they reported the girls missing one year later, but police claimed it was first reported in 2004 or sometime in the 1990s. Very little is known about this case overall except the fact that the girl’s family believe Sandy Morden (Fly Creek Doe) is actually Carlota and they have been trying to convince the authorities of this for some time. A full write up can be found here- https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/rmcs18/when_fly_creek_jane_doe_was_identified_in_2019_as/
Carlota is described as a multiracial female of Native American/Hispanic or Native American/Caucasian/Hispanic (Cuban) descent. She was 5'5 - 5'6 and weighed 110 pounds. She usually wears jeans. She has long straight brown hair and brown eyes. Carlota has pierced ears and a half-circle scar on the palm of her hand. Two of her eye teeth were removed because she was born with two sets. Some agencies spell her name "Carlotta." She may use the name Maria Loop. Carlota was not from Washington State. She was from Yuma, Arizona and was visiting relatives in Washington when she went missing. She is not Pima Jane Doe, Fly Creek Doe (who has since been identified as Sandy Mordon), or a handful of the Virginia Jane Does.
Elsie is described as a Native American female, with short black hair and brown eyes. She was 5’1” and 110 lbs when she was last seen. Elsie is not Pima Jane Doe, Las Vegas 2009 Jane Doe, or a handful of the Virginia Jane Does. https://charleyproject.org/case/carlota-maria-sanchez
An unidentified Native American or Hispanic woman believed to be in her late 20s or early 30s was found on Feb. 16, 1988, near Parker Dam in Union Gap, on the Yakama Indian Reservation. Her cause of death has not been determined but her case has been ruled a homicide. She had been dead for 2-10 months. She is usually described as a Native female, 25-40 years old with dark brown hair 12” long that had been bleached light brown in the front. She was wearing lavender colored pants, a long sleeve shirt with a Mexican label, and brown bowling shoes, one with a black sole and one with a white sole. She was slight and short 4’11” to 5’1”. She is not Daisy Tallman/Heath or Karen Johnley. Despite her place of death she is NOT believed to be Yakama; she may be from Mexico and perhaps a migrant worker as her clothing had Mexican labels. https://www.crimewatchers.net/threads/union-gap-jane-doe-nf-26-40-found-on-tribal-land-along-the-yakima-river-in-union-gap-wa-16-feb-1988.2048/
Ira Kennedy Yallup Sr. was last seen at the Lone Pines Fishing site near The Dalles, Oregon on May 20th, 2010. He was never seen again. It is tempting to believe that this is a drowning, but the Lone Pine FIshing area is actually a village that 35 people call home, not just a fishing area. When the state of Oregon built four dams on the Columbia river between the 1940s and the 1970s as many as 31 Native fishing sites were flooded or destroyed. Later, the Bureau of Indian Affairs and the national government erected new fishing villages along the new banks of the Columbia River which could be occupied and used by any member of the Yakama, Warm Springs, Umatilla, or Nez Perce tribes. Today these villages are run down but they are still the abode of many families who fish for a living. The Lone Pine fishing area is also home to some of the last adherents of the Indian Shaker Church. Whether Ira went missing while fishing or went missing from the village in general is unknown, but I thought adding these details were important to better understand the area in which he was last seen. Ira is described as a Native American (specifically Yakama) male. He has brown hair and eyes. He weighs 110 lbs and stands at 5’5”. When I covered this case previously, Ira did not even have a Charley Project page and his age was listed as “somewhere in his 50s.” Little information is available. http://www.justicefornativewomen.com/2021/03/ira-yallup-sr-missing-from-oregon-since.html
Roland Elton Woodall Sconawah, another Yakama man, also went missing from a traditional tribal fishing area in Lyle, Washington in November of 2013. Roland was only 23 when he was last seen and is described as semi-transient. He is 5’6”-5’8” and between 140 and 160 lbs. with dark brown hair and eyes. Some agencies report his last name as Sconawah Sam. https://charleyproject.org/case/roland-elton-woodall-sconawah
Gary Ridgway aka the Green River Killer terrorized the Pacific Northwest for decades. What many people do not know is that the Green River task force is still in operation. Ridgway confessed to 71 murders, but only around 49 bodies have been found meaning there are more victims waiting to be discovered or reported missing. Two of Gary Ridgway’s known victims were of Native American or background. Patricia Yellowrobe, who was from the Rocky Boys Indian reservation in Montana, Carol Christiansen who was registered Blackfoot, and, but there may be more. To read about the stories of these young victims as well as other victims of Ridgway you can start here. https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/gpbcll/what_everyone_has_wrong_about_ridgway_extensive/
https://kingcounty.gov/depts/sheriff/about-us/enforcement/investigations/green-river.aspx
Teekah Lewis, was a two year old girl who went missing from a Tacoma, Washington bowling alley in 1999. Her case, which is classified as a stranger abduction, is still unsolved.
Teekah is described as a Multiracial female with black hair, brown eyes. Teekah is of African-American, Caucasian and Native American descent. Her mother is Caucasian and Chippewa while her father is African American. She has a large birthmark on her left buttock and red natural highlights in her hair. She has patches of light discoloration on her face and the left side of her buttocks as the result of eczema. Teekah has facial dimples, and pierced ears. Some reports say that Teekah had a silver streak on the right front section of her hair. It is unclear if this was a dyed section or a natural section of gray hair, although I would assume it was natural.
She was wearing a green Tweety Bird sweatshirt or t-shirt, white sweatpants and black and white Air Jordan sneakers, with her hair pulled into ponytails. She was carrying a clear purse with a fish design, containing Starburst candies. Teekah had eczema and also suffered from asthma at the time she went missing. She used an inhaler. Teekah is described as a shy mama’s girl who loved Pooh bear and eating starburst candy. You can read about Teekah’s case here. https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/fm3yhc/timeline_and_lengthy_write_up_of_the_teekah_lewis/ News article- https://www.q13fox.com/washingtons-most-wanted/teekah-lewis-21-years-later-witness-account-could-be-key-to-solving-case-of-missing-girl
Kelsey Emily Collins, a learning disabled, multi racial teen with a tragic background went missing in 2009, possibly in retaliation for agreeing to testify against her former pimp. Kelsey was a victim of domestic violence as well as a victim of minor domestic sex trafficking.
Kelsey has light brown hair and green eyes. She is 5’5”-5’7” and weighs 155-165 lbs. Collins is of African-American, Caucasian, and Native American descent. Some sources say she is simply biracial- Caucasian and African American. Her hair was chin-length at the time of her disappearance. It's naturally curly, but she normally uses a straightening iron on it. She may dye her hair another color. Collins has a two- to three-inch surgical scar on her lower rib cage, a surgical scar across her lower abdomen which developed into a keloid, and a two-inch scar across her left hand and index finger from a box cutter. Her ears are pierced one time each in the lobes and the right side of her nose is pierced. Collins may go by her middle name, Emily; this was her legal name until she was seven years old. When last seen in 2009 she was 18 years old and was wearing a white, black and red Echo athletic jacket, a pink t-shirt, blue jeans and black Jordan sneakers. Kelsey has learning disabilities in both reading and math. She has a speech impediment and significant hearing loss.https://original.newsbreak.com/@the-vivid-faces-of-the-vanished-1590506/2453790443385-her-mother-hung-missing-posters-the-us-attorney-asked-her-to-stop-what-happened-to-18-year-old-kelsey-collins
A full write up can be found here-https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/n2978q/in_2009_kelsey_emily_collins_an_18_year_old/
Bryce Herda, a 6 or 7 year old Makah boy disappeared while with a group of relatives at the beach. A local criminal, a nearby homeless encampment, and a sneaker wave have all been looked at as potential culprits. Bryce is described as either a native or a biracial male- Caucasian and Native American . He has straight, sandy brown hair that was cut short around his ears but was longer in the front. He has a 1/8" freckle in his right temple. He has a light colored birthmark on his upper thigh. When he was last seen he was 4' tall and weighed 60 lbs. His story can be found here. https://www.doenetwork.org/cases/1168dmwa.html https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/g5unfg/a_missing_child_a_nationwide_problem_and_a_serial/
Courtney Holden, a 26 year old mother, was last seen in 2018 but wasn't reported missing until 2019. Her adoptive brother is a suspect in her case but he has not been charged with homicide. Courtney is described as a Native American or Native American and Caucasian female who was 26 year old in 2018. She has brown eyes and black hair. She is 5' 6" in height and weighed between 150-170 lbs. You can read about her case here. https://www.reddit.com/MISSINGBIPOC/comments/r0f29q/courtney_holden_last_seen_in_summer_2018_in/ https://int-missing.fandom.com/wiki/Courtney_Holden
If you are interested in this issue as a whole, I suggest this podcast by Canadian journalist Connie Walker who explains and dives deeply into the issues discussed in the piece. https://www.cbc.ca/radio/findingcleo/missing-murdered-who-killed-alberta-williams-1.4556030#:~:text=Sparked%20by%20a%20chilling%20tip,in%20British%20Columbia%20in%201989.
What happened to these people? And also please stay tuned for part 2!